Experiencing Belonging: Navigating Cultural Dissonance

The journey of navigating belonging in a foreign country can be both a thrilling and daunting experience. For many individuals, the concept of feeling like they don’t belong can be a pervasive and often unspoken struggle. In this article, we explore the feelings of belonging and cultural dissonance, drawing upon personal experiences to shed light on the complexities of identity and acceptance.

Feeling Like an Outcast

From a young age, one’s sense of belonging can be deeply rooted in one’s cultural background. In cases where cultural differences are significant, it can become increasingly challenging to integrate and feel accepted. As the author recounts, their sense of not belonging emerged even in early childhood:

“Ever since I was a kid, I just couldn’t put it into words back then. It’s not a mystery. My background is somewhat foreign. My siblings and I… We think different, our values are different, and we even look foreign.”

This experience of feeling out of place is a common thread throughout many immigrant and multiracial communities. The misalignment between one’s sense of self and the prevailing cultural norms can lead to feelings of isolation and disconnection. Despite making friendships and meeting interesting people, the sense of isolation persists, serving as a constant reminder of the cultural divide.

Searching for Familiarity

Often, individuals find themselves seeking familiarity in other parts of the world. The author describes instances of traveling and feeling a sense of relief and welcome in countries that align more closely with their cultural experiences.

“Little me was just born in the ‘wrong’ place. Very much so. In a country like mine, I feel people don’t relate to problems and have a habit of causing people to develop stigmas. I mean I totally feel that had I been born in the USA or Europe, I would have pulled it off better.”

These feelings of being out of place often fuel a desire to explore other cultures and countries. The author recounts how since childhood, they had always expressed a desire to leave and explore other places:

“Yes, since I was a kid, I would always tell my mom that we should go to this country and that other country.”

The Decision to Stay

family and personal circumstances often play a significant role in shaping one's decisions. In the author’s case, certain events and factors weighed heavily on their ability to leave. The passing of the author’s father and the financial implications meant that leaving their home country was not an easy decision. The author shares, “However, my dad died when I was 12 so I was somewhat worried about leaving my mom and younger brother alone. Money was also always an issue.”

This decision to stay, despite hankering for a different experience, can be a source of both relief and regret. The sense of staying due to circumstances can create a complex emotional landscape:

“So in the end, I did not go. I don’t know if I regret it but something in my gut always tells me that I probably should have kept looking for ways to get out of here.”

Reflection and Acceptance

Finally, the author’s reflections on their experience suggest a deeper understanding of the nature of belonging. They quote John Milton’s “Paradise Lost”, illustrating the idea that one’s sense of belonging is often mindset-driven:

“It’s all in the mind To make Heaven of hell Or hell of heaven.

This reflection highlights the power of perspective in shaping one’s experience. The acknowledgment of past influences and experiences can bring a sense of peace and acceptance. As the author suggests, these complex feelings may be rooted in deeper existential questions:

“Until next time... So I dont know maybe its a karmic thing or past lives do exist and some past version of me is kicking my subconscious.”

Whether karmic or a reflection of past experiences, the author’s journey provides valuable insights into the ongoing struggle of finding one’s place in the world. The quest for belonging transcends geographic and cultural boundaries, touching upon fundamental questions of identity and acceptance.

Keywords

belonging, cultural dissonance, identity crisis