Stand Up for Yourself: A Personal Tale

As I approach my 70th birthday in October, I reflect on a life where respect is not always easy to come by, especially for a woman. Recently, I was told by a younger person that I should 'drink the Kool-Aid', a common phrase that suggests conforming to popular opinion without question. My response, however, was succinctly caustic: since I've passed 65, I no longer tolerate insults and rudeness. I expect everyone to display manners, courtesy, and kindness.

Every day, mostly against myself, I am my own harshest critic. Self-berating is a habit, but I have few people I feel the need to 'stand up to' beyond myself. Differences of opinion and varying levels of intellect often explain these matters, but the last time I faced an truly aggressive confrontation, I will never forget it.

One day, I dropped off my boys with my babysitter and was heading to work. As I approached a stop sign, I naturally came to a complete stop. This particular stop sign is at a three-way intersection, with drivers in the other two directions having no need to stop. A car was descending the hill, so I courteously yielded, having no desire to get T-boned that day. Suddenly, I heard a screech and rumble. A motorcycle rolled up to my open window, where I had the misfortune of letting it remain open in the pleasant weather.

The rider leaned into the car and started to question why I had stopped and called me an 'asshole', proclaiming that I was a 'dumb bitch'. This was akin to a horror story recounted by my husband who drives for 32 miles every morning through the most congested highway in Saint Louis. But this aggressive encounter was a rarity in my life until then.

As this individual, still screaming, weaved from lane to lane to get to the left turn lane, where the road had abruptly turned red, I instinctively pulled to the far right turn lane as I intended to go. Initially, I was going to ignore his antics, having encountered many "dumbasses" in my life. However, I couldn't bear it when I heard the word I never use, the 'C-word'.

My world went black with rage. Thank goodness, no one was around to witness my outburst as I whipped my car around him, looping around his bike twice, tires screaming as I let out the 'C-word'. Then I parked my car in front of him, blocking him, and got out.

Resilience and standing up for oneself is not just for others; it is a lifelong journey. It took courage and self-belief to respond the way I did, but it was essential to reclaim my dignity. This experience highlighted the importance of self-respect and the need to not let others dictate our actions or emotions.

Ultimately, such encounters teach us to be more assertive, compassionate, and understanding. In a world where respect is not always common, it is vital to stand up for oneself, even in the face of adversity. This journey of resilience and empowerment is an ongoing one, and while it may be challenging, the rewards are immeasurable.

Keywords: stand up for yourself, personal resilience, women’s empowerment